Custody & Divorce
There are so many things to think about during separation and divorce, especially when you’ve got children and need to figure out custody agreements and how to parent moving forward. Getting support and guidance for this new way of being a family is one of the best things you can do for yourself and your children.
I am a single parent and I want to tell you something.
You can do this.
As a member of Austin Divorce Resources, and a single parent myself, I am here to help you focus and parent through the confusing and complicated waters of separation, divorce, custody and life after divorce. While my role is to guide you to ask yourself important questions that keep your child’s best interests at the forefront, I am not here to decide anything for you. Decisions are yours to make with the support of family law professionals.
If you are currently working with a mediator, facilitator or therapist, I encourage you to continue to do so. My job is different than theirs and we’re all here to help you get the answers and support you need. While their role is to provide legal or emotional advice as a person, my role is to offer you specific and personalized guidance as a parent.
I’m here to help you keep your kids’ needs at the forefront of your decisions before, through and after divorce. I help you find ways to cultivate grace and resilience, so you can show up as the best parent possible along this journey.
I’m also here to tell you a not-so-secret secret.
Effective communication is key.
No matter where you are in this process, we’ll talk about effective communication; how it’s key to successful parenting and benefits everyone involved. We’ll cover things like how and when to communicate about your kids; issues that arise around scheduling and sickness; what routines you’re going to build for your kids; how to organize for two separate households and how to stay consistent.
We’ll go over topics you might not think about at first: holidays, play dates, homework, child care, school supplies, how and where you’ll meet for exchanges and dozens of other small details that can get lost in the day to day of getting through divorce. The key is routine and as few surprises for your kids as possible.
Communication will be the foundation we’ll use to help you navigate the particular stage of the separation-divorce-custody journey you’re in. Read more about what we’ll cover below.
Separation
If you’re newly separated, or just about to be, there are important things to think about, especially when it comes to custody. You’ll want to be very intentional with the temporary sharing agreement you make, and I’ll help you do that. What you decide in this agreement is often difficult to change as you move forward through divorce.
There are many things to think about at this point, and the more information you have, the better. I help you determine the most important things for you and your kids, to set a foundation of clarity and consistency, right from the start.
Custody
Keeping what’s best for the kids in mind is a great way to keep yourself focused and make sure that they are getting what they need. Shared custody can be tough on parents and it’s even tougher on children, especially if there is a lack of consistency and stability.
I will guide you with questions designed to cover situations that come up when you’re sharing custody with an ex partner and help you create a plan for navigating them.
Divorce
There are critical things that kids need, especially in times of upheaval. Routines, boundaries and consistency are paramount. Once you have those clearly set as a foundation, other issues that arise are less overwhelming to negotiate.
We’ll talk about routines and structure and how to manage when households’ expectations and priorities run differently.
I will help you support your child, cultivate routines and set boundaries that will keep their life as stable as possible.
Being a Single Parent
(With Another Single Parent Who’s Now Your Ex)
One of the toughest things about divorce for your kids is the shuttling back and forth. Clothes, homework, favorite toys or games, phones, ipads, all the things that have to go with them each time.
Creating a system to help manage all of this creates calm and routine, so the process is as seamless as possible for them (and for you). I help you come up with a plan for changing homes that helps your kids feel stable, supported and safe.
Dating & What Comes Next
This is such a delicate area for kids. We’ll talk about what to do when you start dating someone; how to juggle a new relationship and balance what you need with what's best for your kids. I’ll ask you questions about what you envision for your kids and how you can make that a reality. The key is having a plan and communicating with your kids what that plan is.
Wherever you are in this journey, I meet you where you are and we will customize this work to meet your needs. You’ll walk away feeling empowered to make informed choices to keep your kids safe, secure and loved throughout this process.
Custody & Divorce Specific Certifications:
Essential Therapy Training
Between Two Homes: Best practices when working with families raising children between two homes due to separation, divorce, or other family circumstance, Bradley Craig
DISCLAIMER: I am not a therapist, mediator, facilitator, attorney, custody evaluator or counselor. Nothing I say should be construed as legal advice. Anything you choose to do with regard to custody decisions should be fully discussed with your lawyer.